Most of the time, it’s conflict that triggers it, and not just at night.  A strong people-pleasing part of me gets activated—one I’ve spent years working on but that still speaks loudly. Its anxious protests often short-circuit my ability to think clearly enough to make the next best decisions.

At the heart of it, I want to have it all:

• I want to express my needs…

• And I want the other person to stay happy with me.

It reminded me that healing doesn’t always look polished. Sometimes it looks like surviving. Sometimes it looks like remembering. And sometimes, it looks like realizing that the altar—the place of offering—is also the place where we’re allowed to break.