While Mary’s courage inspires me, her surrender—her Fiat—deeply intimidates me. Because if Mary could do it, then so could I. There are many things Mary did that I pray I never have to do. It is terrifying to think about giving up control, especially when it comes to my children…
As a mother, I don’t want to imagine the loss of my child. And yet, I’ve pictured it—more times than I’d like to admit. Intrusive thoughts come unexpectedly, terrifyingly. Even during pregnancy, I remember the vulnerability of knowing how common miscarriages are, wondering: What if it’s my turn? My turn to lose a child. My turn to look death in the eye. My turn to be asked to trust God with something I couldn’t bear to lose.